Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I cannot find my penis.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
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