Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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