I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
