This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
