No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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