Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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