It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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