Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
