I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
