remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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