Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
