Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
50% drunk capacity currently
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
