so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
