I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I did not marry a roomba.
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