So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
