Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
