i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
