look no pants
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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