Pregnant stripper...not hot.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
