whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
