oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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