is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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