If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
And then my night got REAL pukey
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize