I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
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