No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
