oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
