Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
