Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
