is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
