butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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