I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
