i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
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