Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize