please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Randomize
