Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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