I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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