i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
