I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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