I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
