If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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