I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
