It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
