the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
