she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
We smell like vodka and hangover
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