ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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