the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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