We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
