omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
