I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
