I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
